Examined And Laid Bare

A bittersweet day; some days go that way.

I helped Michelle hold open house in Mulkiteo. It was a slow day so I got to spend a lot of time admiring the view. It was impossible not to think back and lament our home in Anacortes. For two years we got to live on the water at Fidalgo Bay. For two years we got to watch Eagles soar, the sun rise over Mt Baker and a family of Otters swim back and forth in front of us. For two years we lived the dream. It was an incredible time; marred by the crash of the economy in 2008 and ultimately our business.

Such is life. One day I was standing on the mountaintop and the next day everything was crumbling around me. It was an experience that caused me to question everything I had ever known. It was an experience that eventually led us to live in China. It's been a long road. 

Since then everything I thought and knew about myself, where I stand in life and where I'm going has been questioned, examined and laid bare. Even my weight issues and the decision to have weight loss surgery were a result of the crisis and self examination.  

I am a different person today. What I cherish and hold dear has pitched and changed. I’m coming to grips with the balance of life and what remains in the sands. My priorities have changed. I have more urgency in what matters to me most and less patience for that which does not. I am determined that when it’s all said and done there be something tangible that defines who I am; earthly success, failure and weight loss aren't it. 

It seems like there should be more.

Sometimes it’s good to reflect. Sometimes it's hard. At least this time the view was awesome.